Losing a spouse is tough, and life afterward is even tougher. Is this process the same for men or women? It doesn’t seem so.
Men may experience a harder widowhood than women due to a combination of several factors. They include emotional and social aspects, economic impacts, and coping mechanisms.
It’s International Widow’s Day, and this article talks about the silent difficulties widowers face.
How Men Experience Widowhood
Social Activities
You probably already know that the level of social activity differs between men and women.
Limited Networks
Most men have a smaller and less robust social circle compared to women. This makes them rely heavily on their spouse for emotional support. As a result, they may struggle to fill the void left by their spouse, which can lead to distress.
They may also be less likely to participate in social activities after the loss of their partner.
Also Read: Understanding the Signs of Parental Alienation
Gender Norms
Besides social circles, some men may be discouraged from seeking help and emotional support. That’s because of traditional gender norms, and this makes it harder for them to cope with grief.
Meanwhile, women are more likely to seek support from family and friends. A network like this provides emotional backing during widowhood. It also lowers the risk of severe depression, which is excellent.
Emotional Expression
Women are typically very expressive about how they feel, not like men.
Cultural Expectations
From a young age, men are taught by society to be less revealing, and many get used to it. This also plays out during their grieving process because they may suppress their emotions.
Less Open Grieving
In line with societal expectations, many men are not open to expressing their pain or hurt. They may also be unwilling to seek out support groups or counseling, which can hinder their healing process.
Household Management
For generations, men have relied mostly on their partners for household management. Although there has been a gradual shift, it still happens in many households.
Adjustments
Without their spouse, men may not be able to carry out daily household tasks and routines. Some would not know how to prepare meals or where certain household items are. This could be because their spouse primarily handled these responsibilities.
So, taking charge of these tasks can be overwhelming and make them feel helpless. Women who are more experienced in managing household tasks may quickly adapt to these changes.
Learning Curve
Adjusting to new roles and responsibilities can be difficult for both men and women.
For instance, if the man handles the house grooming or cleaning, it will be overpowering for the other person to adjust. The same is true if the woman makes the preparations for important family events.
These adjustments will add more stress to their grieving process.
Health
It’s a fact that women live longer than men, which potentially increases the number of widows.
Physical Health
Even though men die younger than women, women tend to have more illnesses. However, men may experience a physical decline in health following an inability to cope or neglect.
It may also be because women are more prone to clinical visits and checkups than men.
Mental Health
The risk of anxiety and depression is mostly higher for men after the loss of a spouse. It could partly be due to a lack of emotional expression and social support.
Financial Impact
Generally, men earn more than women, and this can affect them upon the passing of their spouse.
Income Changes
Due to the gender pay gap, men may experience fewer financial changes or uncertainties. This will not apply to households that rely on the woman’s income, which is not uncommon.
And so women may find it difficult to cope if their spouses are the primary breadwinners.
Also Read: 10 Popular Misconceptions About Women
Financial Management
With higher earnings, men may still have fewer resources in place to manage their finances. This is mostly true if the deceased spouse handles their financial planning.
Remarriage and Dating
Finding love or a relationship anew isn’t the same for widows and widowers.
Social Stigma
Men may face little to no stigma if they choose to date and remarry after the loss of a spouse. However, this may not apply to women due to societal expectations.
Some widows may also choose to stay single due to previous marriage experience or greater independence.
Also Read: 10 Major Effects of Discrimination
Timing
As you would expect, men are more likely to remarry sooner than women. It may be because they place more emphasis on companionship and intimacy. Whereas women often prioritize emotional connection and security.
The Right Support
Nothing prepares a person for the passing of a loved one, much less a life partner. While both men and women will experience intense challenges, they do so differently. However, it depends on individuals and specific situations.
Still, it’s not a matter of what the right way of grieving is, but the right way of supporting them. Understanding these differences help you provide the right support.
Leave a comment